2 posts tagged “dancing”

Weeks Events:
March 19 - Learned yet again why trainers should never try to teach adult learners by reading verbatim from powerpoint slides to the students.  Had a great session with my therapist about the possible etiologies of my horrible procrastination habits.  Skipped derby practice and had a phenomenal date with Sm.

March 20th - Flooding in and around town along with confusion on my part regarding location prevented me from attending a meeting - no great loss.  Watched kids lives being changed by art - Amazing.  Had half of a fantasy fulfilled (was naked in bed, left the door unlocked and called Sm who came over, walked in, we didn't say a word to each other, just started having incredible passionate sex) until the XH interrupted in a very persistent, untimely, and unwelcome way.  Potential disaster averted by Sm & I talking about the awkwardness and then picking up where we left off.  Rushed to an event supporting women's choice, back home, then off to a dance party.

March 21st - Lunch with co-workers, picked up my scooter from storage, helped set up for Sat's bout, hung out with Sm and her friend for the rest of the evening.

March 22nd - Bout Day!  We sold out our bout for the second time - So fun!Amazing game - very well matched teams - I jammed more than anyone else on our team - 13 jams!  crazy.   We lost by 7 points - but we made them earn their win.  The funniest part for me was when I was jamming against this chick and I checked the shit out of her and she looked at me and threw up her hands and was like, "what the fuck?" as if she didn't know that jammers can check each other.  Great afterparty, except for all the March Madness folks at the bar - lame-o's didn't  know that RD is much more exciting...  I asked Sm to be my girlfriend and she said yes.  Drunkenly home + 2 hours of wild fornication = no hangover the next day!

March 23rd - My Jesus Birthday on Zombie Jesus Day!  Brunch with a league member, some  time for me, then more wonderful fornication.  off to dinner reservations and guess what?  Sm threw me a surprise party!  I've only known her for 6 weeks and she freakin threw me a surprise birthday party - how amazing is she?  I was stunned and speechless for several minutes (I have a hard time with surprises), but it was really nice.  Then home and guess what...more and more fabulous loving.  She and I cannot get enough of each other.  I haven't had a sex drive like this since I was 17.  Actually even then, I didn't have the desire to stay in bed for umpteen hours at a time.   Sm  has been kind of amazed at my ...enthusiasm...if you will...for girlsex - esp since it's fairly new to me ( & esp since i'm bi and not a full-time lezzie).  I told her I've known what I wanted in that area for a long time and I've never been shy sexually.   With the few girls I've been with before her I've actually been pretty startled at the reluctance on the part of full-time lezzie's to go down on another girl.  Cause I won't lie, I love it.  Love it.  Okay, back on track....

March 24th -  Bleh Work.  League meeting for Roller Derby.  Tempers flared, accusations between refs and players flew, people got defensive and accusatory...just another league meeting.   Feeling bunk once I got home, hard to sleep.

March 25th - woke up and went to the bathroom - oh that's why I was feeling so bunk last night.  I see.  Hormones are wonderful things, guys, truly.   Worked a bit, left early b/c of a power shut-down, saw Sm for 2/10ths of a second, hung out with my heart sister and ate way too much.  Feeling lonely once home and alone.  Fell asleep promptly tho. 

And that's a week in the life of....

At least it feels like that some days.

My health is improving, very slowly, too slowly for my impatient self, but the throat is not sore any longer and I can breathe again...I still feel pretty tired alot of the time though.  I hate illness.  It's such a crushing bore.

I'm still bored to tears by my job. Don't even want to talk about it.  peh.

Roller Derby - first time back on skates in two weeks - I expected my endurance to blow, but I actually did just fine.  We had a great scrimmage, everyone was in top form - I wish every scrimmage was like that, we'd learn alot more from each other.  I actually hurt more today than I did the day after our last bout!   All the newbies blow up my head with praise for my jamming- I'm trying to ignore it and I'm telling them that I've been skating for 1.5 years now,  a little bit of experience counts for alot in this sport.  They don't seem to hear it though.  Not to mention the mad skills of my pack - No jammer in the world scores points without some support from her pack unless the other team is for shit.  And I typically get great support from my pack - I've been really clear with my blockers about what I need/expect from them when I'm their jammer - and what they can expect from me...it seems to work out very well.  Feeling like a part of such a strong team is inspiring too.  I can't say enough positive about what roller derby brings to my life. 

Sm is still ultra sweet - we went dancing and she spent the night this weekend and it was UhMazing.   She's a little clingy, but she sort of knows where she's coming from (aware of the clingy stuff and why) and we talk about it and I think it's okay.  We're still enjoying talking and doing stuff together and hanging out in general.  So that's fun.

I'm still loving my new house and living on my own.  I was feeling very neutral about the divorce for a few weeks and this week I've had some imaginary angry little internal dialogs with XH and his gf's - I went through about 3 dialogs in two days without even realizing it - now I'm thinking about the dialogs and wondering if I'm touching the anger phase of grief again, mildly?  The thing about phases is that we humans not only move forward through them, but we also move backward through them and even hopscotch around in them a bit.  It's rather annoying when you feel as if you've finished something and then oh, wait, yes, wait, yes, you're there again.  And you're like, wait, this is familiar, haven't I done this already?  I thought I was through with this?  But no.  I'm not completely through with it.  Because I'm here again.  Fuckers.   But I sense that this phase is so mild that it will be pretty short lived.  And that makes me feel good.  And continually hopeful.
 

Unchained

Johnny Cash